WHEN BEING NICE COSTS YOU: Stop Overgiving, Seeking Approval, and Feeling Guilty for Choosing Yourself

You know you want to say no. So why do you hear yourself saying yes?You tell yourself it's easier to keep the peace. You don't want to disappoint anyone, seem selfish, or make things uncomfortable.So you agree. You adjust. You explain. You give a little more.And somewhere along the way, your own needs become the easiest ones to ignore.But when did being kind start requiring you to abandon yourself?WHEN BEING NICE COSTS YOU explores the hidden patterns behind people-pleasing, approval-seeking, overgiving, and the guilt that often follows choosing yourself.It looks beyond the usual advice to "just say no" and explores why setting a simple boundary can feel so difficult-even when you're exhausted, overwhelmed, or quietly resentful.Through relatable situations, compassionate psychological insights, guided reflections, and practical exercises, Miya Kuan invites you to recognise the habits you may have mistaken for kindness.Inside, you'll explore how to: - Recognise the difference between genuine kindness and self-abandonment.- Understand why saying no can trigger guilt or anxiety.- Stop constantly seeking approval and managing other people's reactions.- Set healthy boundaries without becoming cold or uncaring.- Handle disappointment without automatically taking responsibility for it.- Reconnect with your needs, choices, and sense of self.- Build healthier relationships without always putting yourself last.This book isn't about becoming selfish. It's about understanding why choosing yourself has felt selfish for so long.You can care deeply without giving endlessly.You can be considerate without agreeing to everything.And you can be a good person without making yourself the last person who matters.Because the real cost of being nice isn't always what you give away. Sometimes, it's how much of yourself you learn to leave behind.THE UNLEARNING SERIES - BOOK TWOUnlearn the Patterns. Understand Yourself. Live Differently.