The Things We Couldn't Say: Book One: 1

"I'd rather watch you kiss other mouths forever than risk the chance of losing you for good." This is the code that thirty-six-year-old punk rock guitarist Samuel James Johnson lives by. It keeps him safe inside the closet, hidden from fans, from the world, from Adam Kieran Lee, his lifelong best friend, and the man he's silently been in love with since he was seventeen. Unfortunately, though Sam's caution and closed lips protect him from being known, it can't stop the perpetual wounds that Adam, who's by all appearances straight, accidentally carves into his heart when he shamelessly womanizes on tour. Though the two of them have considered themselves close nearly all their lives, a distance has settled between them. While Sam is distracted living a double life and crafting songs with his secret boyfriend, Oliver, Adam is intensely jealous, convinced he's being replaced as Sam's best friend. With random women in Adam's arms, and a boyfriend wanting more from Sam than he can give, tensions eventually come to a head, forcing them to face the things they're terrified to reveal, risking the very loss that Sam has so carefully worked to avoid. The Things We Couldn't Say is a high angst, slow burn MM romance about friendship, secret longing, bisexual awakening, and the courage it takes to love yourself and be honest.

Pages: 420, Paperback, Independently published