the Retirement Survival Guide: What Nobody Tells You About First Year, and Bits That Actually Help

What nobody tells you about the first year of retirement.Everyone at the leaving do will tell you it is the best years of your life. Almost none of them are retired. This is the honest version, written for the year that starts on the Monday after your last Friday.Who it is for. Anyone who has just retired, and anyone standing in a shop at lunchtime looking for a leaving present that is funny but not rubbish.What is inside: - What everyone tells you, and which bits are actually true- The first week, the first month, and the month that catches people out- What to write in a retirement card, when the envelope reaches your desk in 10 minutes- The kit that helps, and the presents that go straight in a drawer- What people say at a leaving do, and what they mean- Checklists for before your last day and the fortnight after it- A short, serious chapter on when to get real help, with numbers that have been checkedA few lines from inside: "Deborah organised the whip-round, because Deborah organises everything, and Deborah is £11 down on it and will never mention this to anyone.""For about five weeks you are the most productive you've been since 2009, and all of it is bins. Then you run out of shed.""Nobody rings you on a Tuesday about nothing. Nothing is the entire genre and it has been cancelled.""Not 'you'll be missed'. Try 'the office is going to be a lot quieter without someone shouting at the printer'."Funny on top, genuinely useful underneath. There is no financial advice in it, on purpose, and no jokes about knees, memory or not being able to work the internet.The first in the Home Truths Survival Guides.