OUTSIDE // INSIDE

Imagine being in your early 70's and suddenly learning a huge familysecret, then finding out that "everyone knew" but you!Mine, like many families, was a family of secrets. A family of doing, not one oftalking or sharing. What happened in the home was never to be told outside."Always wear clean underwear!" "Don't air your dirty linen!" That lived realityproduced the memoir title, OUTSIDE// INSIDE.This is my life, my abuse and survival stories, my relationships, my coming outas a gay man, my choices both good and bad, and ultimately a life ofsucceeding both personally and professionally. Growing up Roman Catholicand attending 13 years of parochial school I was taught that confession isgood for the soul. As a practicing psychotherapist for 40 plus years, Iunderstood and experienced that clients sharing their personal stories wasgood for their spirit. Sometimes it was necessary for their survival. Writingthis memoir encompassed both for me.I completed my memoir just prior to turning 78 years old. Honestly, it wasnow or never (wry smile). Writing allowed me to shine a bright light on thehurtful emotional, physical, and sexual abusive events of my earlierdevelopment, as well as relaying my recovery throughout my adulthood. The safetyand perspective of age, plus the lessons from my profession, fostered awriting style that is like chatting with a friend. Draft readers said they greatlyappreciated the readability, engaging story telling style, and particularly thedry humor and occasional psychological analysis. The Conclusion includes alengthy analysis of the perpetrators, but also of myself as avictim/participant/survivor.