Nobody Told Me

Once you are a parent, you will inevitably say, "Nobody told me," as you run into things that no one prepared you for as the owner of a child. This book will tell you those things that everyone else forgot to mention. This book is not a roadmap through parenthood but rather a sequential guide through my experiences as both a parent and having parents. Each chapter is a parenting topic I believe is important for parents-to-be to know or for existing parents to recall favorably, to remember unfavorably, or cause them to openly weep. You might not have children, but you probably had parents, and this book might help you realize how much joy (or misery) you provided for them. Any of the situations described in this book that you did not experience, or have not experienced yet, will seem like fiction and made-up nonsense. You will laugh them off and move on to the next chapter. There will be other chapters that seem written, word for word, based on situations you went through. Stunned, you will wonder if I was sitting at the kitchen table, in the bathroom, outside a window, down the grocery store aisle, or in the principal's office as a witness while it was happening. Either way, read this book knowing I have lived through most of these experiences and only slightly embellished a few of the others. You will find the ones you think I made up to be the most realistic.